I don't know why I like rap. I can't place where it started. I think with DC Talk's Nu Thang that my parents had on a tape of the Top 10 Dove artists or something. If you remember Nu Thang, I tip my hat. My parents were worried and wouldn't let Molly and I listen to it, and they were pretty sure it was put on that worship tape by accident. They have since loosened their views on what inspired music looks like.
Anyway, that's a tangent, just to say that I like rap. One summer I had a job where I worked until 5 and supper at home wasn't ready until about 5:45. So in the post-work, pre-supper brain-dead zone, I would watch 106 & Park on BET pretty much everyday. It's the video countdown show for the rap videos on BET. I'm not going to pretend like I'm proud of that summer, it just happened. I wouldn't really endorse BET anymore, I dunno I haven't watched it in awhile.
Okay, so one day they had this guy named Kanye West on to talk about his new video. He was brand new on the scene, I think "All Falls Down" had just come out, his first video. No wait, "Thru the Wire" was his first... anyway, he was new. People just knew him as Jay-Z's beatmaker, some techie knob-turner who they unchained from the soundboard, let him make his own album since he keeps whining about it. Then, funny thing, it shot to the top. Whoa.
So he's on BET introducing this new video. Jesus Walks. And he's got like 2 or 3 different versions of the video available. One was kind of a standard, gospel choir, inner city church, Kanye pretending to be the pastor theme. It was good, moving song. Then there was the controversial one. Uh oh. They showed this one last, Kanye talked about how it was his favorite but people told him to make others because it was too heavy. Well, I'll describe it fast and maybe put a link, maybe not. I'll decide after this here description. Children 12 and under plus nursing mothers may exit the blog ... now...
The video has several different storylines running through it. Prisoners digging. Drug dealers getting caught by the border patrol. And this guy chopping wood and sanding stuff. You don't really know what the chopping wood guy is doing. Until like the climax of the song, when he puts on his white hood. KKK style. And the wood is in a cross, which he lights on fire. Then it falls over, he catches it and carries it, catching his whole robe on fire. Then as he's up in flames as this firey, almost demonic symbol of hate, he drops the cross, and the rain clouds that had been gather suddenly gush forth and wash this guy, as he's taking off his robes and soaking it in, having a "come to Jesus" moment. It's moving, I had tears in my eyes. Okay, I already described the controversial parts, so I'll go ahead and link to it here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eFKPd_TRVC8
So on that BET countdown show where this debuted, Kanye talked about the video afterward. He described the rain falling on the guy at the end as a baptism type of scene, washing the guy clean. Kanye said that was what the whole song was about, how none of us are too far away from mercy, Jesus can walk right into our mess. Whoa. And this comes right in the middle of 106 & Park? I was blown away. Jesus, look what you were doing! I went out and bought the album (edited version of course) from Wal*Mart later that night. I was blown away. JE SUS WALKS! Well, Jesus walked on water I guess walking on BET couldn't be that much harder. I was pretty sure that Kanye was going to start a revival and lead everyone who had ever listened to rap to Christ. Beautiful.
Then of course I gave the album a full listen. Jesus Walks, track 7. Get 'Em High, track 9. Yep that song was about you guessed it, drugs. I gradually fluttered back down to earth. I stayed a Kanye fan and tried to keep the faith, hey he was making some good music, better than other stuff out there. The first song release on his next album, Diamonds, has a reference to God in it. So did the songs Never Let You Down and Heard 'Em Say. But scouring his lyrics for a Holy visitation meant you had to push through a lot of references to girls and drugs and money and the usual rap fare. Nuts. Thought we had something, Big K. Thought we had something.
His popularity skyrocketed, though. He decided not to let Jesus walk in, but he went on the cover of Rolling Stone with a crown of thornes. Hmm. The next albums opened huge. I think mostly because of the void in the music scene. There was flat out no one else being creative. And Kanye was, if nothing else, creative. Hip hop violins? Bringing in the guy from Coldplay? Pretty cool. His ego got HUGE. But I think that might finally be getting leveled out. Exhibit A: 808s and Heartbreak. His new album.
That's what this post was supposed to be about from the beginning, sorry for my longwindedness. Kanye put out a new album last week. The last two that he made I rushed to the store and bought pretty soon after. This one, nah uh. As I said before he's creative, and yeah, that shows up on the new joint. He's got no qualms about flipping up his style. Problem is his, *ahem, talent.
Over break my dad and I were watching Conan O'Brian and saw Kanye come on and get interviewed and perform a song. My dad captured it well, that KWest seemed like a different duck. Kind of awkward. Add that with his new style, this slower, gritty computerized drum machine and a voice synthesizer, with Kanye trying to sing. Trying. He's not very good. He admitted it to Conan. He also admitted that the heart he was wearing on his breast pocket was made of legos. Hmm.
My dad mostly captured it. He's still the techie guy, a knob turner, that accidently wandered up to the mice. He's at his prime in the booth, but on stage? Not his gifting. I don't say it to be mean. All of us want to be rockstars, right? But it's not really in the cards.
Molly and I gave the Kanye album a listen, a free trial deal online. I seemed like something that one of your friends would make in his basement, and then you would listen to it all and look for good things to say to your friend, but really, it was a challenge to not hit "skip track" on most songs. It's really sad and contemplative, which I guess is still groundbreaking for a rap album. Just not something I'd like to listen to again.
Miss you, Kanye. Thought we could have had something when you did Jesus Walks. But I guess walking the straight and narrow wouldn't have taken you to the top. He's still waiting. He hasn't walked away just yet. Maybe, here, at this low point, you might be ready to find Him again.
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